My public apology to the Yarn Harlot

I started reading the Yarn Harlot's blog when we moved here to Washington and I was instantly addicted. I get pissed at her if she doesn't update. She usually doesn't post on the weekend, but I check anyway, hoping for a surprise. (I know I need to get bloglines and they'll tell me, I'm just old fashioned, I guess). It's strange b/c you feel voyeuristic, looking into some one's life. She writes mainly about knitting but also about life-her teenage daughters, home improvement, etc. She is a vegetarian, she supports breastfeeding, she organized knitted hats for the homeless, she rarely wears a bra, she has naturally curly hair-I guess I can really relate to her!

Last year, she came to Third Place Books and gave a speech. I dragged my aunt, who was visiting and my man stayed home with the boy. I was giddy as I sat in the back row listening and knitting. I was third in line to have my book signed. I've met a number of famous people-but I was more excited about the Harlot (Sting, Robin Williams, Bonnie Rait, Julia Butterfly, Sean Penn and one of the Grateful Dead members walked in on me in the bathroom at Randy Hayes' house, he probably forgot about it seconds later.)

In January, I attended the Madrona Fiber Festival were Stephanie (aka the Harlot) was going to teach a class for about 15 students! Sign ups started at 8 am. I was online at 7:59 waiting! I emailed her ahead of time and she actually wrote back asking about my expectations, I planned on being the best student there. I kept reminding my husband that I would go, it's was well thought out. I had my bag of knitting projects with questions packed for at least a week. Have I imparted to you how important this was to me?

Well, now we get to the apology part. I woke up totally sick and I had a feeling I might be pregnant. I wouldn't let this stop me. No medicine, no caffeine, only Ginger Ale and mapquest directions-I drive 1 1/2 hours down to Tacoma and nothing goes right. I get lost, I have to pay for parking, I'm driving with a plastic bag on my lap. But, I'm there in time to check out the market place (where I'm tempted to learn how to spin and I pass up Socks That Rock-that will never happen again!!!)

The Harlot lead a great class, but I don't shine. I barely participate, I think of funny things to say, but I just don't have the energy, I don't bring out any of my questions, I don't even have a pen to take notes. So Harlot, I'm sorry. I WAS about 4 weeks pregnant and busy spitting cells and catering to a baby the size of a grain of rice! I enjoyed your class and wanted to say funny things, like when you talked about how knitters are productive people and statistics show the more kids you have the more you knit, I thought, 'Maybe knitting just makes you horny?' You would think that was funny. I had a question on my first sock that I worked on for your Knitting Olympics and wanted to find out how I ended up on the purl side. (It's okay, I figured out that I picked up in reverse.) I know as a mother of three you can find it in your heart to forgive me, and maybe next year I'll bring along a 4 month old and I'll be even more distracted!

Until then I offer you my 2 biggest secretes for curly hair: Aveda's Be Curly is worth every penny and if you get super frizzy try a dot of olive oil in your hands and run it through the top layer.

(Picture is YH and me at Third Place Books, when I was looking pretty good and now I don't look quite like that anymore. I even put in earrings for the occasion!)

A summertime visit to Kentucky. Butters and I went to the pool, 4th of July parade, saw lots of fireworks (very loud and bright eyes according to B), went to the farm, Coney Island, Cincinnati Zoo, and we got to see a lot of family. It was a good time.

Elephant Slippers

I started some bright bubble gum pink slippers on the way to Italy. I've made several pairs and have the pattern memorized so I figured they'd be perfect on the plane, train, etc. They worked up fast and I finished the second one in a week. The pattern is called Fuzzy Feet from Knitty.com, I used Cascade 220 double stranded. They knit up like a giant sock and then you felt them and they magically shrink to be a cute fuzzy booty slipper.

At least, that's what happened the first 4 times I made these. These pink ones looked really big for some reason. I was sure I had it right, they were just bigger than I remember (the hot wheel car is to give you perspective). Into the washing machine they go to get felted, but after, they still looked a little big. I check the pattern. I casted on 52 stitches (from memory, right!) And the pattern calls for 44! FORTY-FOUR! That's like 3 inches in circumference too big! For your FEET! I tried to shrink them more, but they were the right length, not the width. The cat is in the photo for perspective. So, what now? I can't unfelt them or unknit them and they are for a July Kentucky birthday! I might end up getting creative and making them a bag or something. Do you know any needy Hobbits that have cold feet?

In order to redeem my skills, I did finish and felt a bag correctly. This is a mobius Persian sling bag from Cat Bordhi's Second Treasury. I used Cascade 220, again. It's a swap for Butter's music teacher, she's giving us free classes in return.

The Guy in the Cafe

Butters and I had lunch after music today with his 'girlfriend' and her mom. We have a few places we rotate between, they are all kid friendly-high chairs, kid food, toys, and most importantly-not quiet places.

Well, my darling B decided to start screaming in the middle of lunch. We've been working on the Inside Voice and I ask him to be quiet and we say, "That's better," together. For some reason today, he just thought it was funny to yell really loud and keep doing it. This went on for less than a minute and I was trying my best, when the guy at the table behind us, gets up and says, "Looks like I need to find a quieter table." He walks to the other side of the restaurant. My friend and I look at each other with a, "he obviously hasn't spent much time around kids look." Meanwhile, Butters stops yelling and stayed relatively quiet the rest of the meal.

Now, I can't stop thinking about that guy, I'm a dweller and it's a bad habit of mine, but now I'm starting to get really pissed. It's not like I gave the kid a cookie and told him he had a beautiful yelling voice. I was working on the problem. Take a look at me, buddy. I haven't showered today, I'm 6 months pregnant, my food is cold and now I have to worry that I've just ruined someone else's lunch? I'm sorry you HAD to find another seat, but all you accomplished in announcing this to me is that now I feel like shit. I look like shit and now I feel like shit. I'm sorry to everyone in the restaurant, we had a problem and I fixed it. That's how he'll learn that you aren't supposed to yell in public. And worse yet, after that GUY's reaction, I was totally mad at Butters. Now I feel bad for being mad at my son. Why do other people do this to me?

I think I'll go finish off the Ben & Jerry's in the freezer. That will make me feel better. It's Banana Split, a new flavor.

No. I'm still pissed.

Knitting Terminology

I'm digging through my stash (yarn collection) to bring you an update of my knitting projects and teach some of you about the world of online knitting terminology.

Here is one project OTN (On The Needles), it's the first of a pair of socks for a Cmas gift. The recipient will be surprised and warmed. Christmas knitting already? I think I'll be busy the end of this year and was hoping to get ahead of the game!



This is another WIP (work in progress). A mobius bag for Butter's music teacher. It's actually finished and felted and drying right now. I'll get updated photos soon.








This one is embarrassing, it's my oldest UFO (Unfinished Object). It's a denim bag with a beautiful cable strap. All I have to do is sew it together and it's been one year! If I sew it together, I'll have a new bag. That's all it takes, and yet, I haven't done it. I hope to avoid punishment from the stash weasels!

Hi Animals

Hi Cow.















Hi Goat.











Hi Bunny.













Hi Bell.




Photos from Everett's Forest Park Animal Farm.

Maternity Milestone and Myths

I passed an important pregnancy milestone just before my trip to It-lee. I gave into maternity underwear. I've obviously been in maternity pants and tops for several months, but there's always that last frontier. The point where you can no longer say, "you can't really tell I'm pregnant from the back," and "I can still wear my regular clothes, but the maternity ones are just more comfortable." Mysteriously, your undies get smaller and smaller, and then they just downright disappear and you have to get The Big Ones.

With my first pregnancy, I went clothes shopping with my mom. We had so much fun, her mom took her and she wanted to treat me, that's what Moms are for! We got to the undies section. I liked the leopard print bikini's. "Look they even make a maternity thong!" My mom said, "Let's buy you the briefs." Now, this is a woman who would buy me Longbutts at Christmas. You know what I mean, the kind that go halfway up your back. I know it's popular for girls to show their undies these days, but I don't think 9 inches of white cotton fabric showing above and beyond your jeans is what's in.

"I'm not going to need the briefs, Mom. I'll get these bikinis."
"We'll just get a few packs of the briefs." Mom (little did I know), wisely said.

Now, I don't want to exaggerate, but I can't stress how LARGE these SuperLongButtBriefs are. I had to fold them three times just to get them to fit in my regular underwear drawer. Over. Over. And up. They have no right to have the word, Medium, on the tag.

Well, wouldn't you know it, and it wasn't the first or last time, My mom was right. By month 8 or so, I was firing up the heavy equipment: Bring Me My Big Ones, I NEED THE BIG ONES! I just wanted to be comfortable. Without stepping over the TMI boundry, I'm not to that point yet. I'm still in the cute, obviously pregnant but not uncomfortable phase. But, I will try to dispel a popular pregnancy myth: being pregnant can pretty much suck.

I love carrying a child, I'm proud to be a woman, blah blah blah. I've also had vomiting and nausea for 5.5 months and now that it's over the heartburn has started. I have a super short fuse. We aren't blissful and glowing, we are easily irate and under stress constantly. Look at all the information we are expected to handle: drink water, but not too much, eat healthy-avoid fish, sprouts, stinky cheese and anything you used to love before, don't get too stressed-you could hurt the baby, don't get in a hot tub or raise your body temp, get exercise, but don't get out of breath. Don't lay on your back, obviously, you can't lay on your front. Try to get some sleep.

Aside from all that, I do plan to have a great summer with Butters, spending lots of time outside and enjoying being a mom of one, until all hell breaks loose and all three of our lives change forever. And the dog's, for that matter!